I don't think there are words that I can use to explain my feelings about my baby turning four. Some sort of combination of sad, proud, scared and excited, sentimental and probably a hundred other emotions.
Jax's first year of life was a whirlwind for me. Adam and I went from it being just the two of us to suddenly becoming parents to three kids all at once. We found ourselves with a newborn baby and all of the emotions and hormones that come from giving birth and being a new mom along with becoming foster parents to a three and four year old and all of the pain and recovery for them that comes with that (I plan on blogging about our first year with Aubri and Deitrich around their birthday as well). It was wonderful and beautiful and scary and A BLUR. I look back at that first year and I'm a little sad that I didn't document it better because I have a hard time remembering all of those sweet firsts that happened in his first year.
Jax falls into a bit of an odd category. He is my firstborn but he is my middle. I will never forget the day I found out I was pregnant. I think I took five pregnancy test before I believed it. It was about four months later that Aubri and Deitrich moved in with us and in the newness of them my pregnancy kind of went to the back of my mind and it wasn't until i was about 8 months pregnant that we finally went, "Holy cow, we are having a baby!" Without a whole lot of time to mentally prepare I had no idea what to expect (what mom does though!?).
Jax's due date was April 7th and I went into labor early in the morning of Adam's birthday, April 8th and Jax was born 26 hours later on April 9th. I don't remember the exact time (Remember, big blur for that first year) but it was sometime during the morning hours. He was 8 lbs, 6 oz and pure perfection. The minute they laid that baby boy on my chest my heart exploded and completely changed my life and my view of life forever.
Jax is now the most stubborn and sweet boy on the face of the planet. I have never seen a kid that can be throwing such a royal temper tantrum one second (think throwing himself on the floor, screaming and crying that life isn't fair) and loving me and stroking my face telling me I'm his best mommy ever, the next second. He is such a snuggle buddy and our favorite day of the week is snuggle Fridays where we spend the morning snuggling and watching his favorite shows.
He loves to play ball and sword fight and shooter (nerf guns) and is best friends with Aubri, fighting partners with Deitrich and so protective over Ollie.
He has a soft heart towards to Lord and is soaking up everything Miss Lexie teaching him in class at church. I pray and can't wait for the day he fully understands and chooses to follow Jesus forever. I pray that his heart continually stays soft and grows close to the heart of the Lord and that he grows up kind and loving.
Jax, we are SO, SO proud to be your Mommy and Daddy and although I'm sad time is flying by and you are growing up so fast I can't wait to see where this wild and wonderful life leads such a wild and wonderful boy.
Love, Mommy and Daddy <3